It’s Monday, a new week and yet the same old cloud above remains.

The weekend was tough. Being cooped up inside isn’t really an issue and having two kids here for a few days makes me happy knowing they are safe with me. It’s been the biggest topic in my mind. How do I keep them safe.

Because me and their mum split responsibilities, they are here some part of the week and the rest with her. This raises concerns over spread of this virus. I won’t lie, it terrifies me. I’m in a risk factor I would say due to my age and weight although I am slowly getting on top of that but you never know do you.

Shopping is a twat. I’ve shopped online for years and I’ve known it where you have to constantly check to see what is in and out of your basket. I’ll be forced to shop in person soon which going off my last experiences was not pretty and certainly not safe.

I could probably live off baked beans and toast yet finding bread and beans has become a full time job. Frozen food is racing off the shelves it seems and god help if you need painkillers.

It’s highlighted a number of things. People are selfish but if you add being scared to that, I can sort of understand what is happening. We do need stricter rules in place but that itself will bring problems.

I always joke about “just surviving” when people ask how I am. I am literally doing that right now it feels.

I’m tired of all the thinking I am doing. I’m stressing about kids, family, food, money, job, myself.

I laugh sometimes at the things I think of. I feel like I’m planning for about 50 different outcomes. Started planning my funeral which is pointless as I’m sure it will be a closed affair.

I’m hoping it will calm down soon though. Being at home is fine. I am exercising more than normal. Trying to do 30 mins brisk walk every day around the estate. I’m the one, green coat, hands in pocket, head down just walking. Just getting on with it. To be fair, the street is empty but for people doing their garden. I need to do mine soon. I’m eating pretty well. Eating the right stuff and hopefully should I get out of this, will be a few stone lighter.

Anyway that was Monday.